Rhonda Bracey: At Random

So I’m looking at the Google Play store for a relaxing ambient noise app to see if I can mask my mild tinnitus at night when trying to fall asleep, and I come across this review:

Too funny! No, I haven’t downloaded/tried the app yet…

(Text for those who can’t read the image: 4 stars: Maybe too effective. This app works great. My body is now trained to quickly fall asleep to certain sounds. However, I inadvertently activated your app with my car’s hands-free system today and before I realized what I’d done, I had fallen asleep at the wheel. I awoke in the duck pond in the park. Nobody was hurt, and it isn’t very deep, but there’s an extremely hateful goose patrolling the pond that won’t let me exit my vehicle. It’s like a little honking Cujo. Will rate 5 stars if you bring bread to appease this goose.)